Sociologist, full-time volunteer, firefighter, kinkster, feminist, baker... I wear a lot of hats.

Posts Tagged: gender politics

"Teachers are often unaware of the gender distribution of talk in their classrooms. They usually consider that they give equal amounts of attention to girls and boys, and it is only when they make a tape recording that they realize that boys are dominating the interactions.

Dale Spender, an Australian feminist who has been a strong advocate of female rights in this area, noted that teachers who tried to restore the balance by deliberately ‘favouring’ the girls were astounded to find that despite their efforts they continued to devote more time to the boys in their classrooms. Another study reported that a male science teacher who managed to create an atmosphere in which girls and boys contributed more equally to discussion felt that he was devoting 90 per cent of his attention to the girls. And so did his male pupils. They complained vociferously that the girls were getting too much talking time.

In other public contexts, too, such as seminars and debates, when women and men are deliberately given an equal amount of the highly valued talking time, there is often a perception that they are getting more than their fair share. Dale Spender explains this as follows:

The talkativeness of women has been gauged in comparison not with men but with silence. Women have not been judged on the grounds of whether they talk more than men, but of whether they talk more than silent women.

In other words, if women talk at all, this may be perceived as ‘too much’ by men who expect them to provide a silent, decorative background in many social contexts. This may sound outrageous, but think about how you react when precocious children dominate the talk at an adult party. As women begin to make inroads into formerly ‘male’ domains such as business and professional contexts, we should not be surprised to find that their contributions are not always perceived positively or even accurately."

-

[x]  (via albinwonderland)


THIS IS DEDICATED TO EVERY FUCK, male or female, THAT HAS TOLD ME I TALK MORE THAN MY SHARE.

(via shandeleers)

(via shandeleers)

Source: colinfirthhasmoved

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I think that, if in the context of your heterosexual relationship, something comes up and you say to your boyfriend, “______ feels mean to me,” or, “I don’t like it when you do ______________”, and his response implies that you are emotionally manipulative or ‘crazy’ and demands that you deal with the way you made him feel before you get your own feelings addressed…

You should just go ahead and go nuts.  Punch him in the dick.  Set him on fire.  Reorder his Netflix queue.  Publish lists of his favorite bands in high-school.  Set his torrent download limit to 0.1 kb/second and don’t tell him.  Hide frozen fish in his car.  Cut off his eyelashes in the dead of night.  Eat his pets.  Blindfold him, tie him to the bed and dye his pubic hair orange.  Hide naked pictures of David Hasselhoff in all of his drawers.  Replace his hair gel with lard.  Refuse to address him as anything other than ‘Your Royal Highness Samuel Jackson’.  Insist on referring to yourself as a cougar and calling him your cub in public, regardless of your age difference.  Hide a small surprise (it could be Jell-o, it could be action figures, it could be scorpions!) in every single one of his socks.

Because Jesus fuck, if you’re going to play the male privilege ‘all women’s complaints are crazy’ card, we might as well do something to earn it.  Good!  Feel better?  Got it out of your system?  Great.  Now turn around and walk away, because a man who responds to your relationship issues by throwing around accusations regarding your mental health is not worth your time.

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phantomancer:

weirdsociology:

xyrophile:

if i ever find out that one of my friends has been nice-guy-ing me

i will kick his shins once for every nice thing he did in the hopes i’d smooch him

and then i’ll menstruate on his most prized belongings, 

and then i’ll make a blog post about it.

i take revenge seriously

Wait. I don’t understand this “Nice Guy Syndrome”. I mean, if you as a person are interested in someone else as a person, then you would do nice things for this person in the hopes that they will come to appreciate it and you and value you as someone to be interested in as well? It makes a lot more sense to me than being mean to someone in order to get them to like you, but I could just be missing the whole point instead.

No, no, that’s genuinely being nice, as well as interested in someone, which is different.  Nice Guy Syndrome (tm) is doing nice things exclusively with the ulterior motive of expecting sexual favors from (usually female) friends because, “I DID SO MUCH FOR HER.”  It’s usually combined with an unwillingness to actually express interest in verbal terms (“SHE SHOULD KNOW BECAUSE I DID ____ FOR HER”) and a total disinterest in pursuing friendship if the person in question turns out not to be interested in you (“WHAT A BITCH, CAN YOU BELIEVE I BOUGHT HER DINNER AND LET HER CRY ON ME ABOUT HER EX AND SHE DIDN’T EVEN HAVE SEX WITH ME.”  Uh, yeah, dude, she thought you were actually a friend and not just a doucheface.)

This may not be something that men interested in other men run into as much?  I don’t know.

Source: frustgaytion

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xyrophile:

if i ever find out that one of my friends has been nice-guy-ing me

i will kick his shins once for every nice thing he did in the hopes i’d smooch him

and then i’ll menstruate on his most prized belongings, 

and then i’ll make a blog post about it.

i take revenge seriously

(via liquidiousfleshbag)

Source: frustgaytion

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budgiebazooka:

vanboobsenstein:

davidhantz:

I’m a man of self respect. I want woman to have the same self respect. Flaunting your tits so that they are almost falling out of your shirt is not attractive. You know what’s attractive? Intelligence. Self Respect. True beauty. Not any of this whore shit.

I’m unclear on how the positioning of my breasts is indicative of my self-respect or intelligence. 

Also, you do understand that women don’t base their own self-respect on how much you respect them, right? Like, I have plenty of self-respect. I don’t care how much you respect me. Those are totally different things. 

wait hold on i don’t understand what True Beauty means

Can we all just make a Lysistrata-like pact to never ever sleep with motherfuckers who think that body policing is okay again?

If you think my self-respect is bound up in your opinion of how I present myself, you, sir, can suck my enormous cock.


In retrospect I’ve decided it’s not even worth it because “I HIGHLY DISRESPECT WOMEN WHO” and okay buddy that’s it you’re done get the fuck off my planet.

the-absolute-best-gifs:

Romance and Sex Questions in an Airport [x]

Follow this blog, you will love it on your dashboard

John Green, you seem like such a quality human being, and you write like a fiend.  Please let me gently touch your adorable face.

(via thebrokenlyre)

Source: this-isakindness

franticdreams:

Preach the good word.

franticdreams:

Preach the good word.

(via fuckyeahwomenprotesting2)

Source: brofisting

mirandaadria:

I am so sick of this image, so I decided to put my own stamp on it. Holy cow, every time I see someone talk about how this is so “logical” and how it makes “so much sense”, I want to bang my face against the keyboard. No, this is not logical. It’s not logical at all. It is trying to compare apples to oranges.
Yes, a single living cell has life. Believe me, I am aware of this notion. However, that does not mean that any single cell has the right to occupy the body of an already born sentient being without their permission. This is why a living cell found on some distant, unknown terrain, and a single cell found inside a pregnant person’s body cannot be compared. Just because it is alive does not mean it automatically gains the same basic human rights as an already born person. Simple as that!
By the way, having human DNA means nothing! My hair has human DNA, but no one is bitching and moaning to me every time I brush my hair and a handful of hair comes out. My nails also have human DNA, but no one complains when I clip them. Hell, even my menstrual cycle has human DNA in it, but that’s something that’s too icky and gross for even grown ass men to discuss sometimes.
I just… UGH…

Cancerous cells have life too, so if you subscribe to the logic put forth by the original image, NO CHEMO OR RADIATION THERAPY FOR YOU EVER.   Oh, and don’t think about extracting that botfly larvae from your subdermal flesh because it’ll die you know.  Jesus but conservatives are so bad at following the logical implications of a thought. 

mirandaadria:

I am so sick of this image, so I decided to put my own stamp on it. Holy cow, every time I see someone talk about how this is so “logical” and how it makes “so much sense”, I want to bang my face against the keyboard. No, this is not logical. It’s not logical at all. It is trying to compare apples to oranges.

Yes, a single living cell has life. Believe me, I am aware of this notion. However, that does not mean that any single cell has the right to occupy the body of an already born sentient being without their permission. This is why a living cell found on some distant, unknown terrain, and a single cell found inside a pregnant person’s body cannot be compared. Just because it is alive does not mean it automatically gains the same basic human rights as an already born person. Simple as that!

By the way, having human DNA means nothing! My hair has human DNA, but no one is bitching and moaning to me every time I brush my hair and a handful of hair comes out. My nails also have human DNA, but no one complains when I clip them. Hell, even my menstrual cycle has human DNA in it, but that’s something that’s too icky and gross for even grown ass men to discuss sometimes.

I just… UGH…

Cancerous cells have life too, so if you subscribe to the logic put forth by the original image, NO CHEMO OR RADIATION THERAPY FOR YOU EVER.   Oh, and don’t think about extracting that botfly larvae from your subdermal flesh because it’ll die you know.  Jesus but conservatives are so bad at following the logical implications of a thought. 

(via darkthoughtsbrightdays)

Source: mirandaadria

"There are the occasions that men—intellectual men, clever men, engaged men—insist on playing devil’s advocate, desirous of a debate on some aspect of feminist theory or reproductive rights or some other subject generally filed under the heading: Women’s Issues. These intellectual, clever, engaged men want to endlessly probe my argument for weaknesses, want to wrestle over details, want to argue just for fun—and they wonder, these intellectual, clever, engaged men, why my voice keeps raising and why my face is flushed and why, after an hour of fighting my corner, hot tears burn the corners of my eyes. Why do you have to take this stuff so personally? ask the intellectual, clever, and engaged men, who have never considered that the content of the abstract exercise that’s so much fun for them is the stuff of my life."

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Melissa McEwan, of course, on the terrible bargain.  (via albinwonderland)

YES

(via abp)

DROPPING FUCKING TRUTH BOMBS EVERYWHERE

(via darkthoughtsbrightdays)

Source: sanitywatchers

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liquidiousfleshbag:

losertakesall:

maritsa-met:

bricksandmortarandchewinggum:

I’m linking to Jezebel because this take down, by Lindy West, of the Esquire article, Why We Cheat: An Honest Appraisal, is so hilarious and awesome. 

You will not be sorry you read it.

Everyone should read this it is awesome

JACK KEROUAC’S VAGINA

Oh god this is actually wonderful.

I contain multitudes. I am like the Walt Whitman of unrepentant husband-banging.

/ded

Source: bricksandmortarandchewinggum


“I’m not ashamed to dress ‘like a woman’ because I don’t think it’s shameful to be a woman.” - Iggy Pop
Iggy Pop is such a bad ass. There’s an interview I watched where his manager talked about having to bail him out of jail. The manager shows up and Iggy is drunk, disorderly, and wearing a dress. His manager asked “Ig, why are you wearing a womans dress?” and Iggy replied “I beg to differ, this is a mans dress.”
It’s like Eddie Izzard says - ‘They’re not women’s clothes. They’re my clothes. I bought them.’

“I’m not ashamed to dress ‘like a woman’ because I don’t think it’s shameful to be a woman.” - Iggy Pop

Iggy Pop is such a bad ass. There’s an interview I watched where his manager talked about having to bail him out of jail. The manager shows up and Iggy is drunk, disorderly, and wearing a dress. His manager asked “Ig, why are you wearing a womans dress?” and Iggy replied “I beg to differ, this is a mans dress.”

It’s like Eddie Izzard says - ‘They’re not women’s clothes. They’re my clothes. I bought them.’

(via amalockh)

Source: m0su

sexismandthecity:

I’m a slut, I vote.
Take ur conservative laws and go F*** yourself! 3 New Posters for the Woman Bashing Year. - Favianna.com)

Where can I purchase 3,000 of these in 6 ft. x 10 ft. full color please?

sexismandthecity:

I’m a slut, I vote.

Take ur conservative laws and go F*** yourself! 3 New Posters for the Woman Bashing Year. - Favianna.com)

Where can I purchase 3,000 of these in 6 ft. x 10 ft. full color please?

(via fuckyeahwomenprotesting2)

Source: favianna.typepad.com

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tzikeh:

weirdsociology:

tzikeh:

weirdsociology:

A follow-up to this post.

In an interesting twist, Lucy Liu has been tapped to play Watson in the American version of Sherlock Holmes, “Elementary”.

I don’t know how I feel about this (I think maybe I don’t care?), but the fact that someone, somewhere, decided, “Let’s change a character in a male-dominated story to female!”… and they decided not to gender-swap the Guile Hero/Jerkass Woobie main character? Shocker.  Oh look, another ‘head’ main character remains a male! 

THIS IS NOT MY SURPRISED FACE, GUYS. 

Okay, look.

Not only did they cast a woman as Watson, they cast a woman of color. Not on cable, but on network tv. And not just on network tv, but on CBfuckingS. You’re saying that, while you don’t care so much, you’re pissed off that it wasn’t Holmes that they did this with instead of Watson?

Casting a WOC in a lead role on a network show—in a traditionally male role at that—is Huge Liek Woah. But, you’re still dissatisfied. Should she also be a dyslexic lesbian with one arm? What, exactly, do you want from them?

I don’t mean to single you out; all the complaining has been bugging me, and your post was kind of the last straw. It’s not just you, I promise.

Hi Tzikeh!  I’m not sure you understood the context for my post— I’m actually not complaining about the recasting of Watson in the context of feminizing the character overall; I really don’t have a problem with that.  I’m complaining about the LACK of Jerkass Woobie/Guile Hero women in general, and I think my post only really makes sense in the context of this massively overwrought thing that I wrote a while back.

 And I can understand that, seriously. But using an example of a network show that has done something pretty awesome in order to highlight your (quite valid) complaint minimizes the cool thing that the network has done here. It’s akin to saying “Sure, this band has a female lead singer and a female bass player, but WHERE ARE THE FEMALE DRUMMERS? HUH? HUH? of course they don’t have a female drummer. Typical.”

In that way, the post felt very dismissive of the network’s choice. if I’ve misread, then I apologize for not understanding.

I’m not bitching about their choice to feminize (I.. don’t know if that’s the right word, maybe gender-swap is better?)

Yeah, I’d go with gender-swap, or simply “cast a woman in a man’s role.” “Feminize” has a negative connotation (sadly.)

Watson or make her a person of color.  In fact, I think maybe that’s pretty cool?  I don’t know, I haven’t read the opposing arguments yet.

Fair enough.

I’m not mad about this, specific, choice to gender-swap Watson, I’m disappointed in an overall trend that ‘head’ characters in serious dramas are almost universally male and was using this as a supporting piece of evidence for a previous argument….I didn’t intend to minimize anyone’s appreciation of the progressiveness of making Watson a WOC; I don’t think that the fact she isn’t Holmes makes it necessarily less progressive,  

I totally get that. But progress toward gender equality in media is slow, and using a strong step in the right direction to point out a continuing negative needled me. That this isn’t what you’re looking for in a TV show is… I get it? But… hm. I’m not sure how to phrase this. It’s like complaining about a slow song because it isn’t fast, a fast song, and you want a fast song. Well, then this isn’t the song you’re looking for.

I’d be interested in your take on it.

Here it is! :D

Yeah, and I can totally see how perhaps my post came off as minimizing (particularly) the POC aspect, which, to make it clear, I think is probably (always a qualifier since I still haven’t done my research!) pretty effin’ great!  I had hoped that the linking to the previous rant would make it very clear I was speaking to solely the lack of ‘head’ characters who are women and not the race aspect at all.

Still, I think it’s possible to acknowledge that things can be both an improvement and still sort of a token gesture that hints at a larger system of inequality.  To take the band metaphor further, I would argue it’s more like a super-commercial made-for-radio band wherein most of the members are male, but there’s a female lead singer.  Sure, that’s definitely better than no women in the band, but at the same time, that doesn’t mean that the female lead singer wasn’t recruited for her particular role at least partially because we as a society find it the most consumable and comfortable to see women in certain roles.  And, to change metaphors completely and switch back to fictional narratives, one of those roles is the ‘heart’ character, of which Watson is a perfect example.  I don’t think my criticism can be compressed into exclusively a “I don’t like Elementary because it’s not the show I want it to be [or a slow song when I want a fast one],” because it is, I think, at least in part “not the show I want it to be” because of reasons of structural inequality and the way women are portrayed in the media and popular narrative.  

At the same time, I can recognize that NBC certainly did a brave and I think probably a good thing by gender-swapping and diversifying the character.   So excellent!  I really am pleased about that.  It’s just not quite as far down the road as I would like to see us (and I freely admit that I have a stake in this because I idolize ‘head’ characters and about a year ago I realized that all of my fictional heroes were men and so, yeah, for me it’s 100% personal.)  I think it’s reasonable to be both generally happy about a small step* and simultaneously disappointed that this step didn’t go in the direction/as far as I might have hoped.

So I don’t think it has to be totally one way or the other.   I think perhaps we could agree that, if given the chance, we’d slap NBC on the back and say, “Excellent call!  Let this be the beginning of an era of equal representation?“ 

(And then I can go and find a writer and refuse to stop jumping up and down on them until they can conceptualize the idea of writing a nearly-godly hyper-intelligent social-engineering emotionally-unavailable grade A badass of a woman and then I can run away with that script and never stop kissing it.  I may starve to death but it’d probably be worth it.)

But seriously, thank you very much for taking the time to respond and do so in such a thoughtful way.  You really have made me re-evaluate how I expressed myself, and the implications (some of which were highly unintentional but definitely still present!) of such.

*I think maybe part of the problem was I said, in a fit of poor wording, (“I don’t care”) about the recasting?   A much, much better choice would have been, “I don’t have an opinion yet because I haven’t looked into the implications apart from this one thought,” which is really what I was trying to convey, and my phrasing was exceptionally poor at saying that.  You know how it is— it makes sense when you’re writing it!  And then you read it later…

Source: weirdsociology

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A follow-up to this post.

In an interesting twist, Lucy Liu has been tapped to play Watson in the American version of Sherlock Holmes, “Elementary”.

I don’t know how I feel about this (I think maybe I don’t care?), but the fact that someone, somewhere, decided, “Let’s change a character in a male-dominated story to female!”… and they decided not to gender-swap the Guile Hero/Jerkass Woobie main character? Shocker.  Oh look, another ‘head’ main character remains a male! 

THIS IS NOT MY SURPRISED FACE, GUYS. 

[edit] I think perhaps this post is getting a bit misconstrued as me not appreciating the gender-swapping of Watson.  Please see above for a more complete explanation.

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In which I yell, at impressive length, about how much I love antiheroes, and also pose the question: where are the goddamn women in the type of fiction I like?  (And for some reason the page break’s not working so I apologize profusely for spamming your dash with all of this.)

Before I commence my fannish screaming about sexism and narratives, it’d probably be helpful to have some idea of what texts I’m talking about.  So, in no particular order:

Sherlock, BBC, Season 1 & 2, Mark Gatiss & Steven Moffat

The Lymond Chronicles, Dorothy Dunnett

Doctor Who, BBC, Seasons 5 & 6, Steven Moffat & a frillion other people but mostly Steven Moffat

Along with passing mentions of Bones.

Don’t worry if you aren’t familiar with all of them, I’ll do my best to explain what I’m talking about— and also to keep it all (fairly) major spoiler-free for the books on the list.  The one major spoiler I’ll be giving away is the identify of Lymond’s love interest, who is throughout the series but isn’t clarified as such until Book 5, but— and trust me on this one— you don’t mind.  You really don’t [1].

Most of this will probably be Sherlock-focused, because that’s my most recent fandom and the one that sparked all this intense thinking.  I’m fairly confident, however, that the central tenant of the argument carries across to all narratives of this same type.  So, onward!

If you’re a certain type of person, you’re probably drawn to a particular type of narrative and character in your fiction, right?  And I know, because the Internet is a wonderful place, full of wonderful people who are startlingly open about their fictional attachments, that I’m not the only person who really, really loves a Guile Hero/Jerkass Woobie.  You know what I’m talking about: those freakish characters of such intense intellect that they’re always three steps ahead of not only their enemies, but all their friends and loved ones as well.  These attractively crazy bastards are the heroic incarnation of the Chessmaster, the Trickster and the (usually within semi-heroic limits) Manipulative Bastard, and are just so damn good at it that you can’t help but love them.  It’s a pleasure to see them on the page or on-screen, weaving such elaborate plots that they frequently only narrowly escape accidentally entangling themselves in the strands.  Combine that with the Universe constantly fucking them over so hard that you’re sitting there swearing it can’t possibly get any worse (the Woobie), and the social grace of your average scorpion (the Jerkass), and you have a list of my favorite characters of all time.

That’s not to say there is no diversity within the Guile Hero/Jerkass Woobie type, because there’s lots!  You have the ones who are polite until someone flips their jerk switch, at which point they may drive you to near-suicide (the Doctor), the ones that stomp all over social niceties in hobnailed boots until they need them to achieve a semi-tangible goal (Sherlock), and the ones who are, alternatively, the suavest of social engineers and the most devastatingly belittling dickwads (Lymond).  But all of them share certain traits:

  • Terrible things happen to them.  A lot.
  • They are frequently, inexcusably nasty to people who don’t quite deserve it.
  • They are all semi-godly in ability, be it intellectual, athletic, or aesthetic— or, most frequently, all three— and arrogant about it.
  • They are always put in situations where there is no totally acceptable solution, at which time they will calmly undertake the action that does the least amount of damage.

We can say, in shorthand, that these characters are “head” characters— they live in their minds, and they often say or do things that bring their belief in rationality over emotion to prominence.  They may do a very good job of pretending to be warm and fuzzy, but when the shit hits the fan, they are able to turn it off and calculate exactly what needs to be done, even if it means a great deal of loss for them personally.

And now that you’re all looking at me funny going, “How is this at all related to feminism?”, I’m going to plead that you hang with me for just a bit longer and you’ll see.  But first, we gotta talk about Irene Adler and River Song and Philippa Somerville.

There’s been a lot of text on the webernets recently devoted to debating whether or not these women fall into sexist stereotypes (the linked article is only one of many— a quick Google should provide you with hours more reading both for and against, if you so desire.)  And a lot of good points have been made on both sides, far more than I could ever recap here without breaking Tumblr due to the sheer wall of the text.  And I think that the fans who are crying, “Sexism!”, have a legit complaint; but I also think they’re not digging deep enough.   In fact, I’ll go so far as to say it outright: when we hate on Irene Adler as a sexist stereotype, we’re not hating on Irene Adler at all.  We’re hating on Sherlock himself.  I know that sounds weird.  Stay with me?  Because I want to lay aside the sexism aspect for right now and discuss, instead, some reasons why these love-interest characters have to be how they are, for narrative structure.

Irene Adler’s a really good example of this: if you are a writer handed a character like Sherlock who has literally never been outwitted before, and who is, in the original text, uninterested in anything to do with sexual activity, and you want to play up the dramatic tension, it makes perfect sense to bring on a character who is as unabashedly sexual as possible, because that’s basically the only thing that’s guaranteed to fuddle your leading man.

It goes in the other direction, too.  Lymond, the smooth-talking seducer who has the entire French court, male and female, literally playing dice over who gets to bed him first by the second book, is later (hilariously) saddled with a virginal child-bride who is trained to be a courtesan by the best teachers in Europe (the keepers of the Ottoman Sultan’s harem) and whom he cannot touch.  It’s Sherlock all over again: Lymond has no idea how to handle this woman who is so far outside the realms of his experience she might as well be from another planet. Like Irene but in reverse, you can argue that Philippa’s de-sexualization in this context is sexist, but the fact remains that it’s the only way to provide the necessary drama in the plot, particularly when they (of course) fall in love significantly later in the relationship.  These things may come off as anti-feminist, but they make a lot of narrative sense.

So if the manipulation of the female love interest’s sexual presentations isn’t the problem, what is?  Well, I’ve read some concerns about River and Irene and how they are being portrayed as “irrational women”, incapable of divorcing themselves from their emotions and suffering for it.  (See: “I AM [SHER]LOCKED”, etc.)  The same accusation could absolutely be leveled at Philippa.  And really, what it boils down to in one sentence is this: if Sherlock, Lymond and the Doctor are the ‘head’ characters, then Irene, River, and Philippa, no matter how intelligent and capable, have to be the ‘heart’ characters.  Fictional romances work off of opposition and drama and unresolved tension, and having two characters who are both capable of making totally rational decisions against their own emotional interests ends a romance awfully quickly.  Someone has to be the one who stays there even after it’s no longer a good idea, and since we’ve already set up the main characters as the super-rational ones, it’s going to have to be their love interests.  Without Irene’s slip-up, her actual feelings for Sherlock would have gone totally unrevealed to either him or the audience, and the tension would have died right there [2].

The same idea applies to scenarios larger than just the romance, as well.  When River tells the Doctor that she’ll suffer more than every other living thing in the universe if she kills him, she’s speaking from her heart— and it works because we’d never, ever hear the Doctor say something like that. 

I sound like I’m writing some kind of horrible apologia for the women in these stories, don’t I?  I want to make it clear: I’m not.  I think there’s a deep seed of sexism buried at the root of these narratives, but we’re looking for it in the wrong place.  Irene, River, and Philippa are not sexist in and of themselves; their portrayal is justified because that’s how the narrative has to operate.  And I’m okay with that.  I love them!  I think ‘heart’ characters are strong and wonderful and amazing in their own ways, and I particularly like Irene, River and Philippa because they manage to balance their incredible I-can-keep-up-with-the-big-boys intelligence with their passionate hearts and (for River and Philippa) their stubborn loyalty.  I idolize these ladies, I really do.

You know what is sexist though?  If you’ve been paying attention, you might have noticed that every Guile Hero/Jerkass Woobie I’ve listed is a dude.  Where the fuck are our female Sherlocks, Doctors, Lymonds?   Why are our much-loved ‘head’ characters only men?  That’s what’s sexist about these stories, right there.  Irene and River and Philippa are not the problem; Sherlock and the Doctor and Lymond are!  If ‘heart’ characters are needed to play opposite ‘head’ characters, why are all the ‘head’ characters men?  It’s sort of like a chicken-egg question of sexism: do we blame writers for making all the ‘heart’ characters women, or do we blame them for making all the ‘head’ characters men?   Personally I’m more inclined to go with the latter. 

And here’s the thing that really gets me: even in those rare instances when female Guile Heroes/Jerkass Woobies are present, their stories are not told in the same way.  Like Bones.  Look at that list of things that happens to Guile Heroes/Jerkass Woobies again.  Don’t almost all of those apply to her?  Yep, they sure do!  But the show’s writers are a far damn cry from treating her with the respect Moffat & Gatiss afford to Sherlock; instead, Brennan’s social ineptness and intellectual ability are played with a strongly tongue-in-cheek flavor, and, instead of her romantic counterpart playing second fiddle to the Guile Hero/Jerkass Woobie plotlines, the entire show revolves around her relationship with the male ‘heart’ character, Booth. Jesus Christ.  If that’s not thinly-veiled sexism, I don’t know what is.

And sure, it’s possible to argue that the choice to make Sherlock, the Doctor, and Lymond men is entirely understandable, due to the writers being handed pre-existing characters (in the first two cases), or writing about a time-period where women didn’t do much swashbuckling (Dunnett.)  But I’m not talking about just these stories any more, I’m talking about a whole genre, dammit.   So next time you hate Irene, or River, or Philippa, or one of their counterparts, ask yourselves: are you hating them?  Or are you hating the fact that the preternaturally intelligent, distant and weirdly attractive main hero is almost certainly male?

So this is what I want.  I want my Guile Heroes, my Jerkass Woobies, to break out of this ridiculous sexism, this automatic masculinization.  In the next five years, I expect— no, as a consumer of media, I demand— serious storytelling about absurdly intelligent, emotionally inaccessible, sarcastic and wounded women, and their loyal, clever and emotionally volatile love interestsAnd if I don’t get it, well, I’ll write it myself.  And yes, that’s a threat.  And a promise.

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[1] I’ve given that series to probably 20 people to read and only 2 of them have made it through so statistically the chances of you ever slogging your way through Dunnett’s ridiculous historical accuracy and untranslated quotations is only 1:10.  And I say that with great respect for you, and great admiration for Dunnett.  They’re just… not for anyone who doesn’t want to come out the other side with the practical equivalent of three history degrees, a linguistics minor and a need for several years of therapy.  Highly recommended, of course.

[2] I know there’s some debate on whether or not the fact that Irene ‘loses’ their game to Sherlock reinforces the idea that women must ultimately lose to men; but Moffat has explicitly come right out and said Irene ultimately took the prize and that’s good enough for me.